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Sam Dobson Writes: Survival of the Fittest Friendship

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Survival of the Fittest Friendship

Good Morning Loyal Followers!

Sorry I have been MIA the past week. I had a horrible weekend of work, followed by an icky cold. The past few days I've had the voice of a fifty year old who's been smoking all her life, complete with a nasty cough. Not pretty. I would have liked to take the time I spent in bed to write, but if I so much as read a sentence my head felt like it would explode. So, I swallowed some cold meds and stayed in bed.

Today, I'm feeling better. A little bit of the cough and smoker's voice still lingers, but all in all I'm back on my feet. Couldn't be better timing either! Tonight is my turn to host Girl's Night, and it is the first Girl's Night in the new pad. Very exciting. Some of you who have been reading since the beginning (I applaud you) are aware of this ritual my friends and I practice called "Girl's Night". Basically, we set aside one night every couple of weeks or so for just us girls. No husbands or boyfriends. This time is consumed by drinking wine, snacking on carbs and cheese, and the ever important practice of gossip. Having our own grown up lives, it can be difficult for all of us to get together. Girl's Night is a special exception, and bailing is crime.

Friendships are an interesting concept. I think of all the "best friends" I've had over the years. Many of these friends-forever relationships were in fact not forever. Life gets in the way, people move, personalities change, etc. I had three best friends all through elementary and middle school. We literally spent almost every day together. We were sure we would all be friends forever. High school disrupted this perfect foursome. We started to hang out in different cliques and I eventually switched schools. In the present, I am only in touch with one of these girls, but I will always remember how close we were as kids. They will always be my childhood sisters.

High school can be brutal. Friendships betrayed and broken to make way for new ones. My four best friends now were my best friends in high school as well, but the group was a bit bigger. We lost a few friends along the way, mostly to out of state colleges. After that, we never really got close again. I find it strange that at one point, a group of friends can know everything there is to know about each other and later in life act like strangers or distant acquaintances. I guess those are the friendships that aren't meant to last.

Life long friendships take work. You become like family and have to navigate through all the drama that comes with it. I would say that my girlfriends and I rarely have heavy conflict, but we do have little dramas here and there. Even sisters fight. That's what we have become, sisters. We support each other through tough decisions. We keep each other in check and celebrate accomplishments. We guide each other when one is lost and help each other hold onto faith. True friends help each other up after we have fallen beneath ourselves, and afterwards love each other just the same.

This kind of friendship is rare. If you can withstand all the changes that life throws at you, then you've got something special. Surviving graduations, career changes, moves, tragedies, weddings, and children ensures a life long friendship. If you think you've got a lifer, hold on tight and don't be afraid to fight for that friendship. It won't always be easy, but no relationship ever is.

I invite you to take up our tradition of Girl's Night. You won't regret it. It will give you that much needed time to just sip wine and gossip with your girl friends. The best therapy money can't buy.

Friends forever,

PS: I want to sincerely thank all of you who follow my blog. I'm rather amazed by how many of you there are. If you would like to actually "follow" my blog, you can become a "follower" by clicking the "join this site" button to the right of this page, located above my current followers. You don't have to actually join, you simply sign in using your Gmail account or your Yahoo account.
Thank you again for your readership!



At May 24, 2012 at 11:56 AM , Blogger Jess said...

So true! You think have you these strong bonds and then people just go their separate ways. I'd also like to add how you can be distant from someone for so long, but still care deeply about them as a friend. I just reconnected with a friend who I haven't seen, or really talked to, in 9 years. It was actually surprising to me how strong a friendship we still have (and it wasn't like it was SUPER strong to begin with either). It's refreshing and a nice re-addition to my life :)


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