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Sam Dobson Writes: Why Women Love Christian Grey

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Why Women Love Christian Grey

Good Morning Lusty Ladies,

At the urgency of some friends and family members (all female), I have started to read the ever-so-popular Fifty Shades of Grey. After reading the first chapter, I was already rolling my eyes at such an unlikely meet-cute (how a future romantic couple meet in a story, in case you didn't know). Any normal woman in real life would be suckered into interviewing this dashing multi-millionaire only to be seen as the annoyance of his day. Never mind the even more unlikelihood of him stalking said woman and becoming completely obsessed. Okay, so the book and I did not get off to a great start.

Despite the crappy writing and the ingrained notion to chuck such material, I am still reading. I am almost done and now understand why so many women are completely enthralled with the book. It's the ultimate fantasy. No, I'm not talking about the whips and chains, although that may be it for some of you (winky face). I am talking about the fantasy of "fixing" a bad boy. So many good girls fall for bad boys; I know, I've been there more than once. We fall head over heels for that mysterious asshole in the hopes that he will ditch his wayward lifestyle to better himself just so he can be with us. Sound familiar?

The blame falls onto fiction like Fifty Shades of Grey. Christian Grey is the epitome of the Byronic Hero. Not ringing any bells? Probably wouldn't unless you majored in English Literature, as did yours truly. The Byronic Hero is named after the poet Lord Byron's male characters, all of which were moody, mysterious, and almost villain-like. Much like our Christian Grey, the Byronic Hero is arrogant, cunning, yet self destructive. He is jaded and haunted, often from a dark and twisted background. He is sexually attractive and socially dominant. Let us not forget that he is emotionally challenged, rebellious, and naturally a bad ass. Coincidence? I think not.

why women love christian grey
Photo Cred: GQ

However much we deny being attracted to such men, it is inevitable. He may be super sexy but his arrogance and hot-headed tendencies would lead us to swear up and down that our flirty banter was actually a verbal beating. It's not our fault. We have been brain washed, in a way. Every protagonist, male character in the history of literature and film inherits at least most, if not all, of the Byronic Hero's traits. We would never be lusting after and daydreaming about a fictitious Mr. Grey if he was passive, self conscious, and kind of a square who dressed in Walmart attire. Instead of being excited and lusting after his "Red Room of Pain", we would be frantically wondering how he was going to kill us in it.

So, what is the desire we have inside us to "fix" someone? Writers and directors have pulled us in with plenty of irresistible, bad-news men, but I am thinking it goes deeper than that. Perhaps it's that natural urge to nurture. After all, this love of the dangerous seems to be pertinent mostly to women. Men may get their jollies off on tattooed, tough chicks every now and then, but those women usually don't make it past sex on a first date(nothing against tattooed ladies, mind you, I've got a few of my own). The bad girls don't become the sought after wives and mothers, but the bad boys are sought after in hopes of being tamed by love. This is why women love Mr. Grey; why women who barely read gossip magazines run out to Barnes and Noble and dedicate themselves to reading a whole trilogy in record time.

The interesting thing in all of this is that every woman is a Kate. We all recognize that our best friend's flavor of the month is a jackass who will never change. However, we are all the naive female lead as well, believing that this incredibly sexy man will drop his shady ways to make us happy. Why are we so sure of this? Because of literature and movies. Nine times out of ten the bad boy says "goodbye" to his naughty ways for the leading lady. How often does this happen in real life? For example, what's the phrase every mother repeats to her daughter? "Once a cheater, always a cheater". And yet, women every where have a new sense of determination to find their very own fucked up Mr. Grey. Good luck, Ladies! I'm rootin' for you! Can't wait to hear all the juicy details over a glass of wine when you've conquered him.

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At July 26, 2013 at 7:10 AM , Blogger Victoria Poulin said...

I am excited for the Fifty Shades of Grey movie. and i watch Christian Grey's work it is pretty awesome to see on the screen Christian Grey

At August 1, 2013 at 6:40 AM , Blogger Rosalie Langevin said...

I loved the book Fifty Shades Of Grey. I am so glad i enjoyed Christian and Ana's story. I like Christian Grey

At August 31, 2013 at 6:12 AM , Blogger Emma Lavoie said...

Yes, Matt Bomer fits the profile very well. I hope he considers the role.
Christian Grey


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